We spoke to Chuck (he/him) in Buffalo, NY on June, 26, 2026 who shared the story of his late first husband Wayne. Wayne served in the US Army for a year and a half before he was dishonorably discharged in 1964 following an investigation of his sexuality that had been based on hearsay. Decades after Wayne’s passing from AIDS-related complications in 2004, Chuck filed a petition to overturn his discharge into an honorable one. He considers this an act of restorative justice, a way in which a historical “wrong can be righted.”  

Chuck remembered that Wayne was patriotic and “very proud of his service.” He hadn’t not been openly gay, but the investigation and the subsequent discharge outed him publicly, including to his family. Chuck told us that living with his discharge status had been “hard for him, and he wanted to get that fixed.” Just as Wayne was starting to get sick, he requested his military records in hopes of beginning the process, but he didn’t have an opportunity to see it through.  

When Chuck found Wayne’s records, he decided to file the appeal. “I wanted justice for him,” Chuck told us. “He deserved recognition for serving.” The VA initially told Chuck that he could not file posthumously on Wayne’s behalf because the organization did not recognize Chuck as family member since they had had a same-sex civil union. Chuck pushed forward regardless; he reached out to Lawyers Serving Warriors and wrote a detailed letter explaining the impact the discharge had had on Wayne. Two years later, he received an unassuming letter in the mail that contained a certificate stating Wayne’s status had been overturned. 

Chuck organized a military funeral for Wayne in November 2025. He recalled that he was moved at hearing Taps and receiving the burial flag. The funeral, like the process of overturning the discharge status, was an emotional experience for Chuck, with both personal and political significance. “I kept remembering a quote I heard from a Marine: ‘is this the hill you want to die on?’ And the answer was ‘yes.’” Today Chuck lives in Buffalo, NY as a proudly out gay man with his second husband Rich.